Trial by Trailer: Including…John Wick: Chapter 3

Is this good?
Will this be good?
Every movie trailer answers or challenges those 2 questions. The ham-fisted rebuttal comes swiftly, however: no you don’t need to always see a movie to know it’s tank.

Do you really need to sit through a Michael Bay Transformers movie to know for sure? Tank is Tank. And Fresh…well Fresh is always Fresh. I’m down like I’m Brown for that.

For the week of March 17-23, 2019 I cover:
The Night The Kids Found Out
Wu-Tang Clan: Of Mics And Men
Quiet Storm: The Ron Artest Story
The Corporate Coup d’État
Toy Story 4
Once Upon A Time In Hollywood
Stranger Things 3
John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum

Shall we begin?

The Night The Kids Found Out (March 17)
The Night The Kids Found Out is a Riverdale type horror movie set in a creepy small town. It’s got a high school setting and a prom scene…alright I’m in. Screening next week at Scotiabank Theatre!

Sammy Verdict: I won’t watch Riverdale but I’ll watch this!

Wu-Tang Clan: Of Mics And Men (March 19)
Bring Da Ruckus!! Hot Docs 2019 is screening the Showtime’s Wu-Tang Clan: Of Mics And Men!!! The four-part docuseries premieres May 10 on Showtime! #SetTheVCR

Sammy Verdict: I’m in with the group that gave me helpful advice like Protect Ya Neck.

Quiet Storm: The Ron Artest Story (March 19)
A Hot Docs 2019 Recommendation: Quiet Storm: The Ron Artest Story! Yo from the Malice at the Palace to the Lakers (yes…Kobe is in this!! #GOAT) this is the story of Ron Artest (is he back to being Ron Artest?!)

Sammy Verdict: I’m a sucker for a solid sports documentary.

The Corporate Coup d’État (March 19)
A Hot Docs 2019 Recommendation: The Corporate Coup d’État! This is Fred Peabody’s follow up to his scintillating 2016 documentary All Governments Lie: Truth, Deception and the Spirit of I. F. Stone.

Sammy Verdict: Bonus? Chris Hedges, yo. I’m IN!

Toy Story 4 (March 19)
Not a fan of most Pixar movies (Up and Wall-E that’s about it) but for Toy Story 4 I dig the evil menace of Slappy-Goosebumps even though that’s not him. Is it?

Sammy Verdict: If they started including Chucky in these movies then I’d so be in. But until then…

Once Upon A Time In Hollywood (March 20)
QT’s Once Upon A Time In Hollywood stars the kid from Growing Pains (Leo Sucks) & the guy from Fight Club (Brad’s great). Haven’t seen The Hateful Eight & I skipped Inglourious Basterds. This I might see; show me more.

Sammy Verdict: I trust Quentin…I don’t trust DiCRAPrio.

Stranger Things 3 (March 20)
Netflix’s smart for releasing Stranger Things 3 on July 4 with many people off work this’ll instantly be binged. Season 2 is as awful as Will’s bowl haircut and should been as cut short as Barbara’s dumb life thankfully this looks much better. Not a fan of this lazy tv seasons with like 8 or 10 episodes…if the season sucks it’s a waste of everybody’s time. Least 22-24 episodes give writers a chance to write the ship.

Sammy Verdict: I’ll come back for Season 3. Let’s see what ya got…

Watching The Detectives (March 22)
By the bright glint of Mr. T’s gold chains! John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum trailer has more delicious ruckus than most action movies. Like the trailer!! Some dudes went out so hard like the chump chest-collecting knives. That’s What You Get!!

Sammy Verdict: #TeamRuckus Reporting for duty…May 17, 2019

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Listen to My Summer Lair @ W • T • F


Also published on Medium.

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