Is this good?
Will this be good?
Every movie trailer answers or challenges those 2 questions. The ham-fisted rebuttal comes swiftly, however: no you don’t need to always see a movie to know it’s tank.

Do you really need to sit through a Michael Bay Transformers movie to know for sure? Tank is Tank. And Fresh…well Fresh is always Fresh. I’m down like I’m Brown for that.

For the week of February 17-23, 2019 I cover:
Long Shot
Most Beautiful Thing
Formula 1: Drive to Survive
The Highwaymen
Level 16
Mapplethorpe
Poms

Shall we begin?

Long Shot (February 17)
Long Shot which sounds like a Seth Rogen documentary is indeed a Seth Rogen movie…he’s doing the awww who me thing? again. How is Seth Rogen different than Adam Sandler?! Same characters/same movies.

Sammy Verdict: I can sit through this; I can’t pay for this…

Most Beautiful Thing (February 20)
If you sit through Marvelous Mrs. Maisel then Most Beautiful Thing on Netlflix will probably your Get Down. Out March 22nd…I dunno.

Sammy Verdict: I’ll give it 10 minutes but they clearly didn’t make this for me.

Formula 1: Drive to Survive (February 20)
Formula 1: Drive to Survive is a Netflix sports documentary…I don’t follow car racing at all (not even for the crashes) so I’m out but that’s what they want. Still happy to support Creators who make something with a bouncer at the door; instead of a blind attempt for the mass market. March 8.

Sammy Verdict: They didn’t make this for me.

Level 16 (February 21)
Level 16 mixes horror and sci-fi with timely social commentary on women…there’s some Get Out-ness and some The Handmaid’s Tale-ness & some Black Mirror-ness happening here. S’playing in Toronto March 15 Cineplex Cinemas Yonge-Dundas.

Sammy Verdict: Fun sci-fi movie…I’ve seen it already; I’m on it!

Mapplethorpe (February 21)
Mapplethorpe stars the 11th Doctor as Robert Mapplethorpe…I dunno: Matt Smith is more Patti Smith! If you hadda make a biopic I’d prefer Patti’s sublime Just Kids one of the strongest books I’ve ever read.

Sammy Verdict: May watch this on Netflix.

Poms (February 22)
Diane Keaton is Seth Rogen…one note performances same recycled ideas. There’s nothing fresh here. All of that is wholly true…so is that I’ll watch Poms when it’s on Netflix. I mean I sat through Book Club.

Sammy Verdict: You’ll be better off seeing Don’t Talk to Irene!

-28-

Listen to My Summer Lair @ W • T • F

Also published on Medium.