Trial by Trailer: Including…Apollo 11

Is this good?
Will this be good?
Every movie trailer answers or challenges those 2 questions. The ham-fisted rebuttal comes swiftly, however: no you don’t need to always see a movie to know it’s tank.

Do you really need to sit through a Michael Bay Transformers movie to know for sure? Tank is Tank. And Fresh…well Fresh is always Fresh. I’m down like I’m Brown for that.

For the week of February 24-March 2, 2019 I cover:
Apollo 11
I Am Richard Pryor
Amy Schumer: Growing
Dark Phoenix
Turn Up Charlie
Hellboy
When They See Us
After Life
We Die Young 

Shall we begin?

Apollo 11 (February 25)
CNN Films extends their excellence with Apollo 11 out March 1st to celebrate the moon landing’s 50th anniversary! “We choose to go to the Moon not because it’s easy, but because” “risk is our business.” YES!

Sammy Verdict: 100% IN! Space Is The Place!

I Am Richard Pryor (February 25)
Paramount Network’s latest I Am documentary (stay tuned for I Am Patrick Swayze…seriously?!) is I Am Richard Pryor. Pryor’s contributions are so great he’s worthy of multiple docs. March 15th 10pm.

Sammy Verdict: Oh man this is so #SetTheVCR.

Amy Schumer: Growing (February 27)
Remember when Amy Schumer had the audacity to demand a Netflix pay raise following large sums to comedy giants Rock and Chappelle? That payout lead to the awful Leather “Special.” She’s back biting Ali Wong…March 19. This is just…getting irresponsible.

Sammy Verdict: #CrapCarnival

Dark Phoenix (February 28)
I’m kinda more in for Dark Phoenix than I am for Captain Marvel. Either way June 7, 2019 we return to Jamaica Bay for X-Men’s Endgame. How crazy is that in 2019 we’ll witness X-Men and Avengers eat it…so many heroes going into the ground.

Sammy Verdict: Eh…not opening weekend money but I’ll get to it.

Turn Up Charlie (February 28)
Idris Elba is way too popular for the kind of work he turns in. Remember The Rock’s Tooth Fairy? Turn Up Charlie is like that bad…more like Tune Out Charlie. On Netflix March…eh doesn’t matter when. (Can’t believe there are fools who want him to be James Bond. Please see his work in The Dark Tower before making such corny recommendations!)

Sammy Verdict: #CrapCarnival

Hellboy (March 1)
Hellboy is fantastic violence and lives up to its gory Rated-R. And yet…I dunno. There’s an ambivalence that seductively whispers wait for Netflix. Sigh.

Sammy Verdict: I already miss Guillermo del Toro.

When They See Us (March 1)
Ava DuVernay doubles down on social media marketing (to be fair A Wrinkle In Time flopped so this ain’t always effective): even the title is a hashtag: When They See Us. Ava DuVernay is quickly becoming predictable which is the worst offense for a filmmaker. She’ll hafta stretch grow and trying something compelling to be considered great.

Sammy Verdict: Skip this; watch the compelling documentary The Central Park Five instead.

After Life (March 1)
After Life is the latest series from Ricky Gervais on Netflix March 8. I expect darkness and sarcasm with a British stiff upper lip.

Sammy Verdict: I’m IN…I mean I even sat through The Invention of Lying so I figure this is gotta be better.

We Die Young (March 1)
Yoooooo! Jean-Claude Van Damme vs MS-13…be sure to watch the trailer to the end…one of the gang members holds his piece sideways. Classic. We Die Young is out now…I dunno why.

Sammy Verdict: I’ll Netflix this so hard. Oh man. Oh yes.

-28-

Listen to My Summer Lair @ W • T • F


Also published on Medium.

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