Countdown to Chaos

If you were around ya gotta check out Time Bomb Y2K streaming tomorrow on HBO Max.

This documentary explores the millennium bug, also known as the Y2K problem.

In the 1960s, computer memory and mass storage were scarce and expensive. Early core memory cost one dollar per bit. We’re still in the classic computer filled whole rooms era. The moon landing was in 1969. (At this moment, the processing power in your phone exceeds that which NASA harnessed to effectively launch astronauts to the moon. I’m not sure how true it is, but that’s the cheesy thing to say.)

Therefore computers were hard coded with 19 and 2 blank digitals to determine the year in order to save space, time, and money. Cheques used to do the same thing…the dates already had 19 printed on em followed by a short blank for the remaining two digits.

Now, when nerds in the 1960s or 1970s would correctly point out the year 2000 was relatively close they were ignored or shushed or dismissed.

This is the quintessential crisis reaction; the human template. There are always people ignored along doom’s path. They might not have had the right personality or authoritative platform, but we handle most predicaments this way.

We either reject the prophets or, worse yet, we pay the wrong people attention.Due to their uncanny ability to elevate ordinary people’s sense of significance, dilettantes will always be in demand. Like your feelings matter. You can have whatever feelings you want about the millennium bug…it’s still an issue that needs to be addressed.

Worse as the documentary reveals…the basic belief was today the two digits code works just fine. The Year 2000 was somebody else’s problem. Also traditional human behaviour. Rather than address the problem we pointed the (middle?) finger.

Now if you’re still writing a cheque in 2000 you can cross out the 19 and write 2000. It’s not clean but it’s functional and it works. No biggie.

The problem was all the lines of code that would in 1999 suddenly flip over to 1900 on January 1st 2000. We were told that the erroneous 1900 date had the potential to bring down worldwide infrastructures in all computer reliant industries. Airplanes would plummet from the heavens. Electricity would fail.

In short we should expect the LA Riots. That’s weird marketing. It created an unnecessary panic.

I still don’t understand why the public was informed. Having lived through Y2K, this recent pandemic…Deep Impact and Armageddon…telling the public is frequently a terrible idea.

Transparency doesn’t create comfort. I had no way to fix/address the Y2K bug. Okay then I’ma take a nap.

The pandemic is the same way. Fix it. Lemme know. I have no experience in medicine and no practical scientific knowledge. I’ll watch Simpsons reruns till you’ve worked everything out.

In Deep Impact and Armageddon a comet or an asteroid is expected to smash the Earth. And? I’ve no degree in astronomy, and I’ve never been to space. Watching a handful of NASA rocket launches doesn’t qualify me at all. This is not my area so there’s no value in informing me. Fix it. I’ll be reading a science fiction book about life on Mars over here.

It’s the late 1990s: there’s limited computer programmers. More? How many individuals could truly solve this problem with code? At the time, this was a small community.

And the majority lack access to the electrical grid, to nuclear power plants and other vital infrastructure that were bound to malfunction. Literally half the population could do nothing. If you didn’t have contact with infrastructure and you couldn’t code what value could you contribute?

Why was a mostly useless public informed that the millennium bug was a pressing issue?

Was airing this issue by putting it on the Six O’Clock News the best way to communicate the crisis? Then hope that smaller businesses would react appropriately? With what resources? I don’t think we handled this quandary well.

Among the strange reactions to the Y2K panic it naturally created an industry. Panic is profitable. The documentary covers this greed well. Massive expos selling all kinds of survival gear that was necessary because we were gonna be abruptly thrown into the Stone Age. Survival books on how to survive, speakers…seminars, all contributed to a doomsday cottage-industry. We observed all this during the pandemic.

None of this is scary. This is just the NBA all over again. There are only a handful of players or teams who deeply care. They hire well, scout smartly and focus on all the details that matter outside the actual basketball games.

The same principle applies to all governmental levels and industries. The ones who care are obligated to fix it. Send me an email when you’re done; I’m napping.

Punk Rock Vegas

A Throwback Tuesday…I was in Vegas this past October. And I was gifted a solo day: everyone was off doing their own things and we’d all meet up for dinner.
So I set off to visit the Punk Rock Museum which freshly opened this past April. Website hours for today are 10:30 am.
By the time I reluctantly donned pants and slowly drank my tea I showed up to the Museum at around 11 am.
Which was closed. What is today? Do I know how to read English? Is this some sort of punk test? Do I break a window to get in?!
This employee-dude came to the door and informed me the Museum is delayed opening today due to a wedding.
Oh. Yeah…Vegas. You can get married at the Punk Rock Museum in Vegas. There’s an impressive romance to knowing that.
He politely requested I come back in a little bit. I set off for a nearby 7/11 to consume rubbery pizza and play slots.
Oh. Yeah…Vegas. You can play slots in a Vegas 7/11. There’s an impressive bleakness to knowing that.
Wandered back to the Museum which was now open and letting us Misfits in.
As I wandered into the exhibitions…bam: there she was the lovely bride. Standing in front of a David Arnoff photo of Dave Vanian the lead singer of The Damned.
The Bride and The Damned. Well that pretty much sums up Vegas.
I snapped this photo and chatted her up a bit. The groom was loitering in the British punk section.
Today is their 1 month anniversary.
I hope these romantic-punks are having a grand adventure and they have 1-2-3-4!! kids.

Faux Fandom: The Phantoms of Fandom

As faithful My Pal Sammy readers know in June I was in New York City covering the Tribeca Film Festival.

At Tribeca I met half of Milli Vanilli: Fab Morvan. Chatting with the guy who was in Milli Vanilli is a strange experience. Like: do you bring it up?They were an incredibly popular duo that were caught lip-synching. It’s a common fact; it’s on the record.

But now speaking to a human boy with emotions…Fab…do you talk about the music…that they didn’t sing? Or even write? And how do you bring up the lip-synching incident anyways? Honestly? It’s been 20 years why rehash it?

It’s a strange celebrity encounter; the way many people will talk loudly to a blind guy.

The realization directed my thoughts to Louis C.K. I’m not a fan but I’ll watch his specials, I am a comedy nerd and he’s a comedy giant.

But if you met Louis C.K. do you bring up his specials…certain jokes you like? Maybe you discuss Louie his TV show or his TV show writing (i.e. The Chris Rock Show) or his movies (i.e. Pootie Tang).

No matter what you discuss there is an elephant in the room. In late 2017 it was revealed Louis C.K. willingly participated in inappropriate behaviour.

Granted, some people would skip all the comedy and go right to judgement if they encountered Louis C.K. Which doesn’t make sense because people are more than one thing.

The issue is that’s not how we view celebrities.

Celebrities are just one thing. Girl You Know It’s True.

#SetTheVCR: TV Double-Dipping

Timmy: “You double-dipped the chip!”

George Costanza: “So?”

Timmy: “That’s like putting your whole mouth in the dip! Look, when you take a chip, just take one dip and END IT!”

Seinfeld is clearly right; though sadly double-dipping doesn’t just apply to chips at a funeral.

Double-dipping is an odd and silly TV trend.

On Valentine’s Day 2017 (good marketing!) Netflix streamed Ashley Madison: Sex, Lies, and Cyber Attacks. “The shocking story of the Ashley Madison hacking scandal.”

Ashley Madison is a Canadian online dating service and social networking service…for individuals who wish to have an affair. Tinder for married people.

In 2015 it was hacked and the personal information of millions of users was released to the public. Sounds like a fascinating backdrop for a documentary. Currently Netflix’s doc sits at 5.5/10 on IMDB. Not good if you hold ratings like that in high regard.

Then on July 7, 2023 Hulu offered a three-part docuseries The Ashley Madison Affair. This one “follows the hack of an infidelity dating website for married people that shocked the public with a scandalous data breach.” So…same concept? It’s batting 5.8/10 on IMDB. Not good if you hold ratings like that in high regard.

Sure…it’s longer than the Netflix doc. And the data breach was 2015; perhaps the 2023 docuseries had more time to review and catalog the fallout. Sure.

But…really? We Did This Already.

Why do we “need” two documentaries on horny married people?

Why are we Double-Dipping?

Here’s another TV Double-Dip.

Hillsong pastor Carl Lentz helped to lead Hillsong’s first church in the United States, in New York City, starting in 2010.

Hillsong, is a charismatic Christian megachurch based in Australia. Lentz’s (Instagram) popularity and friendships with famous folks like Justin Bieber and Kevin Durant began to slide the church away from authenticity towards a superficial platform focused on fashion rather than faith.

Eventually, criticisms of the church flourished: Hillsong’s finances were questioned, the church’s outdated position towards LGBT people snowballed into What Abouts for other groups, while church enemies were silenced or outright ignored.

And Carl Lentz became the latest disgraced pastor when the news broke of his affairs and moral failures. It’s a story as old as the Bible: Hillsong Church flew too close to the Sun. Though that means there’s a lot to unpack for a documentary.

So: a four-part docuseries Hillsong: A Megachurch Exposed premiered on Discovery+ on March 24. Cool, thanks.

Then The Secrets of Hillsong, a four-part FX documentary series started streaming on Hulu on May 19. What? Again?

We Did This Already.

There’s that much compelling footage and story for 8 hours of TV?

As a viewer how do you know which one is better?

As they’re both documentaries: which one practises sound journalism and manages to avoid cheap tabloid sensationalism? (Do you want the facts or the dirt? Gossip no matter how true is not journalism.)

Do you watch both of them?

Do you watch the one you have access to? Maybe you have Hulu (well Disney+ Canada) but don’t have Discovery+.

The Secrets of Hillsong has an interview with Carl Lentz. Hillsong: A Megachurch Exposed does not.

But! Hillsong: A Megachurch has an interview with Ranin Karim, the woman whose five-month affair with celebrity senior pastor Carl Lentz led to his downfall. The Secrets of Hillsong does not.

So then do you watch both to get the complete picture?

Is this downfall that captivating for 8 hours?

You don’t find any of this frustrating?

The Mighty Return Of The Album

I had a striking pop culture experience two weeks ago.

It dawned on me I was all over the place in terms of how I was consuming music. Like a toddler eating spaghetti I was messy and sloppy.

I still get valuable cultural points for consuming new music at my age and being curious and going down strange sonic roads.

Lotta people we know comfortably settled into Coldplay as their final destination and they’re good with that. That will not be my epitaph:

Back in the day we used to sit down with an album: it was an appointment.

We invested time into an album; leisurely letting it become an essential feature of our emotional soundtrack.

I wasn’t doing that anymore. I’d strayed from that. That was the distressing realization that prompted the striking pop culture experience.

I was consuming music the way that kids today consume music. Just all isolated, no context. I can name maybe 5 Cage The Elephant songs…but I couldn’t tell you which albums they came out on.

Or even which ones came first representing a growth and evolution of the band’s sound. Nothing.

I know Cage The Elephant but I don’t know Cage The Elephant. It’s like reading headlines and thinking you’re well-informed.

I’d hear a dope song at a barbecue or maybe over the radio in my car and I’d be like yo that’s fresh. And that’s the end of the exchange.

It’s like those nerds that collect action figures who keep them sealed in their original packaging. I wasn’t playing with the musical discoveries I’d made. I wasn’t connecting with them or letting them infect my imagination. Oddly by not consistently pushing play I wasn’t allowing for play.

So 2 weeks ago on Monday I fired up Achtung Baby. U2 released a 2018 remaster of the 1991 album. I pushed play on Zoo Station and I went through the whole damn thing right to the final note on Love Is Blindness. For 55 minutes and 27 seconds I lingered like a bad houseguest who won’t leave.

The Vanishing Symphony: Nothing Compares 2 U’nique Talent Fading Into Legend

Yo…

This is related to Sinead O’Connor…and yet it’s not.

Shortly after learning about her surprise demise, I coincidentally came across a 91 (maybe 92) interview with Peter Buck, the R.E.M. guitarist.

In the interview, Buck and his interviewer were paralleling U2 and R.E.M. because obviously they are contemporaries. At least at that time they were.

U2 were touring Zoo TV to support Achtung Baby. R.E.M. had released Automatic For The People (a fantastic album).

Tangent No.1:
(Confession: Initially I had a difficult time getting into Automatic. It’s like when you go out at night and you run into a fit girl in a tight outfit and she just wants to go table dancing and have fun. She temps you with devilish offers like “just one more drink.”

But you gotta go home because you require sleep as tomorrow you have a big presentation at work or an LSAT exam or something. Normally you would be a total gentleman to help her to get up on the table to dance, but it’s just this one night that you happen to meet her and it’s truly not possible. You’re both off. Different moves, different vibes, different wavelengths.

That’s what Automatic was like for me when it first came out. Eventually I sat down at a beach to consume the whole thing properly and welcome it into my life. Now it smoothly soundtracks my emotional monologue. My favorite track is Drive. With it’s subtle callback to David Essex’s Rock OnDrive is incredible. Buck salt and peppers the song; his restraint knowing he can do so much more is impressive. It’s like a delicious sandwich crafted by a chef.)

Embrace The Beauty of Words: A National Poetry Month Celebration

Well: April is National Poetry Month.

I’m surprised Poetry doesn’t have a bigger affect on our lives. Especially considering the technologically driven way we live. You’d think Poetry would be bigger than it is.

I mean it’s quick, it’s fun and when done well it’s packed with artistic goodness. Like a literary vitamin for those that don’t have the time or the attention span of a novel. Or even a short story.

Poetry can be fun. A strange truth, yeah?

Somewhere along our journey clumsy burnt out English teachers made poetry dry and academic. TV sitcoms ridiculed the spaced out hippie beatnik. There just didn’t seem any space or room in our lives for serious legitimate Poetry.

The best Poetry accurately captures a moment. Frozen in time you can get the luxury of self reflection which granted not many people want. Especially if it’s a regret or a mistake.

No matter what the moment maybe…it happened. We’ve all said words we wish we could take back. We’ve all had moments of pure and utter bliss (some even with our clothes on). The trick is to aim on getting it right more often than not.

I’m glad we have a month to celebrate poetry but really it should become a lifestyle. I wish I brewed some seriously serious tea more often; to sit down with a dog eared copy of a poetry book.

So: won’t you celebrate with me National Poetry Month?

Here’s a poem I wrote…
Not By A Long Chalk

I think I will always
—at least for now—
write in chalk.

I can no longer believe in the permanence of things.
Heavily I realize how often things
fade, rust, disappear, are lost, are forgotten
…die…
And while Chalk may not leave
an adequate mark
the relentless rain and thoughtless hand can
oh so easily erase my thoughtful conclusions:
short summaries of the hurt I’ve endured;
Chalk easily assigns value to my rendered words
for they are not permanent.
The McRib of emotions: {here for a limited time only}.
Words furnished in Chalk are
but vapours on this Earth
a temporary DNA like a ghost free of memories.
And while it may be a shame to lose
what I currently and in public call wisdom
perhaps: it is better this way.
So much goes unsaid and yet often what is said
is hurtful.
Progress is writing in Chalk
an antidote to the vanity of doing the crossword in pen;
unburdened by history my simple Chalk conclusions
freely appear like uncertain apparitions who
fade, rust, disappear, are lost, are forgotten
…die…
just like me; I will shortly follow
having made less than a mark as chalk.

-28-

#NewBookAlert: May Your Weekend Be Booked Solid With Solid Books

Tis a break from the My Summer Lair podcasts and #SetTheVCR recommendations to offer book recommendations.

A new season means new books. A new season means new perspectives.

I’m currently reading Rick Rubin’s The Creative Act: A Way of Being. (The passage from above is a quote/snapshot.)

It’s a slow read, happily so. Rick’s writing style allows you to languish between the pages. Some serious tea, a couple of lazy rainy days…and it gently opens the mind for fresh creativity. So enjoying it.

For this #NewBookAlert newsletter I present 4 books. Not 5 or 10 or some other cleanly rounded number. Nah man, 4 it is: 2 novels; 2 non-fictions.

And 3 of the books overlap thematically. One is a random surprise. Cue: One Of These Things Is Not Like The Others.

I’ll let you decide which one is not like the others.

Though that’s why I’m presenting these specific books. These 4 books are about fitting in just as they are about thinking outside the box. They’re populated with distinct characters and unique individuals.

Not to get all Mister Rogers You Are Special on you.

Like, the final writer I recommend is W. David O. Taylor who tweeted on May 17, 2022:

“I’m reminding myself today that it’s OK to be un-interesting, unexciting, and un-remarkable and simply be a human who loves his wife in practical ways, makes lunches for the kids, files folders, grades papers, puts laundry away—and that this too is God-blessed good stuff.”

So true. That’s a beautiful simplicity. Most of us can’t be on the wrong side of history because…history is not gonna record us. We’re simple people who…enjoy the simple pleasure of reading.

As such here are 4 recent books for your reading pleasure.

What are you reading?
What recent book kept you up at night past your bedtime…one more chapter, bah!?

Leave a comment

? Sunset Empire (A Morris Baker Novel #2)
by Josh Weiss
In Beat The Devils (Book #1) the Red Scare never ended. Joseph McCarthy became President & the HUAC is a terrifying secret police that crushes rebel activities & punishes disloyalty. Oh boy.

Twitter avatar for @GrandCentralPub
Grand Central Pub
@GrandCentralPub
BEAT THE DEVILS by @JoshuaHWeiss is out in paperback today, just in time to catch up before SUNSET EMPIRE hits shelves in hardcover next week! Learn more about these alternate-history thrillers in which the Red Scare never ended: bit.ly/3JmuUjb
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4:21 PM ? Mar 21, 2023
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Favourite Line: “Nothing else mattered, except the cause.” Beat The Devils is out in paperback; recently released. Just in time for the dynamic follow up Sunset Empire. It’s December, 1959: The Korean War rages on. And President Joseph McCarthy is determined to rule American with an iron fist.

Favourite Fun Fact: An alternative universe Steven Spielberg shows up in Sunset Empire…working for an underground adult film studio. (McCarthy’s presidency is devoted to overt antisemitism. No surprise there.)

Favourite Gut Punch: Beat The Devils…opens with a murder. Who dies in the first chapter? Why…an up and coming young journalist named Walter Cronkite. I dunno why but Walter Cronkite’s murder was a gut punch. That’s so sad and so rude. Devils follows Detective Morris as he attempts to solve Cronkite’s murder. For more on Book #2 here’s an excerpt.

Favourite Text Excerpt: via The Hollywood Reporter.

? G-Man: J. Edgar Hoover and the Making of the American Century
by Beverly Gage
A bio on the O-G…Man: J. Edgar Hoover.

Twitter avatar for @VikingBooks
Viking Books
@VikingBooks
Congratulations @beverlygage! ??? G-MAN is the WINNER of the 2023 Bancroft Prize in American History and Diplomacy! Start reading the book that @NewYorker calls “crisply written, prodigiously researched, and frequently astonishing” now: bit.ly/3FVeUmV
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5:08 PM ? Mar 9, 2023
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Favourite Line: “We cannot know our own story without understanding his, in all its high aspirations and terrible cruelty, and in its many human contradictions,” writes Gage.

Favourite Fun Fact: Hoover had professional relationships with eight U.S. presidents. That’s a lot of power. Never realized it was that many. He’s like the Billy Graham of law enforcement. (Billy rolled with at least 11 Presidents…)

Favourite Gut Punch: G-Man is a disturbing and definitive work that sheds new light on the man who helped shape the conservative political landscape of America today. This is, in part the story of how we got here.

Favourite Text Excerpt: via The Atlantic.

? Never Sleep
by Fred Van Lente
Meet Kate Warn the first female private detective in American history.

Twitter avatar for @BlackstoneAudio
Blackstone Publishing
@BlackstoneAudio
Happy #pubday to #NEVERSLEEP by @nytimes bestselling author @fredvanlente ??? ?You can order this historical adventure (and @AppleBooks spring pick) right HERE? buff.ly/3vDLBPq
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6:33 PM ? Mar 28, 2023
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Favourite Line: Nothing to do with the historical novel but this is a fun line. Many moons ago I took Fred and his lovely wife Crystal Skillman to Honest Ed’s in downtown Toronto. Looking around at all the crap on the walls, the loud signs…the comforting chaos of the sloppy displays he concluded: “This store is…like a physical manifestation of the internet!” See? Great line.

Favourite Fun Fact: Based on a true story! It’s 1861 and the first female agents of the Pinkerton National Police Agency are racing against time to foil an assassination attempt on the President Abraham Lincoln’s life. Secessionist high society, secret societies…it’s all happening! What’s so civil about war, right?

Favourite Gut Punch: This isn’t the Ford Theatre assassination of Abraham Lincoln! It’s another attempt on his life. Obviously and sadly the Ford Theatre attempt was successful. Single tear…

Favourite Audio Excerpt:

?A Body of Praise: Understanding the Role of Our Physical Bodies in Worship
by W. David O. Taylor
“I dedicate my book to dancers.”

Twitter avatar for @JacksonWoosley
J.D. Woosley
@JacksonWoosley
It is truly a thing of beauty to hold this one in my hands today. Spent a long time waiting on this one.

Grateful for the brilliant mind and pastoral heart of @wdavidotaylor! Excited to learn from him a bit more about what it means to be human.
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10:06 PM ? Mar 24, 2023
Favourite Line: “I’ve been thinking about this book for 25 years. I’ve been working on this book for 4 years.”

Favourite Fun Fact: “What we do with our postures, gestures, and movements in worship matters. How our senses of sight, scent, sound, taste, and touch are involved in worship matters. How our spontaneous and prescriptive activities form us in worship matters. All of it matters to faithful and fulsome worship for the sake of a body that is fully alive in the praise of God.” Interesting perspective, not sure if I agree. I’ll hafta read this book and get into it. I value books where you can argue with the page.

Favourite Gut Punch: Chapter 8 is why I’m recommending this book. (Well that; and I also enjoy dude’s outstanding writing.) Chapter 8 focuses on “Artistic Perspectives on the Body in Worship.” Super curious about but I gotta read all the way to Chapter 8? Alright then; let’s get started. I’ll put the kettle on.

Favourite Texts: Follow David on Twitter & IG. He posts these wonderful payers and rich cultural insights. It’s a joyful mashup of culture and Christianity. (Sometimes those are the same things…)

#CouchWorthy: March 2023 TV Highlights

How is TV treating you these days?

March Madness is always a fun distraction. April 1st is the Final Four games while April 3 is the NCAA Championship Game: all of em are on CBS. (I wonder how working from home during March Madness has impacted productivity and the ratings?)

On TV I just wrapped up The Fall. One of those creepy British police procedurals centered around gruesome murders. Kinda like Broadchurch with those Sherlock long episodes (hour and 20 minutes). (I said British to provide a easy shorthand but it’s really an Irish production filmed and set in Northern Ireland.) The Fall ran from 2013-2016. CBC Gem just picked it up; might still be on Netflix? Check.

Gillian Anderson is the face you’ll recognize; she plays Stella Gibson, a senior investigating officer who reviews investigations. Is this accurate? Her role is to assess the progress of a murder investigation that has remained active for longer than 28 days. I’ve never seen 28 Day Reviews in American police TV shows.

Anyways what her 28 Day Review reveals is that a couple of the recent murders could be linked: looks there is a serial killer operating in Belfast. Dum, Dum, Dum!

The third “series” was kinda eh, but the first two were dark and disturbing delights. We tend to view serial killers through the lens of psycho and victims. And yet the impact they have on a community, on families, the stress it puts on cops, the anxiety of women as the bodies pile up: means serial killers are more like a virus.

Yes COVID is a disease but it affected so much. That’s what serial killers do; they’re a virus. We pay a steep price for failing to address broken people in our society.

Our inability to properly and effectively care for the broken people who populate our society creates a widening ripple effect of trauma. A serial killer’s childhood or his busted life are butterfly wings. It’s the Butterfly Effect of hurt.

Anyways with The Fall wrapped up I’ve started The Night Agent. Yo!

I never read Matthew Quirk’s novel but The Night Agent about an FBI agent who gets a Federal Booty Call (U Up?) has been fast fun. Classic heart-pumping action and lots of Kiefer Sutherland can’t trust anybody this goes right to the top shadowy machinations.

The TV series follows the crooked journey of Peter Sutherland a young FBI agent who finds himself caught up in a conspiracy (of course he does!) that threatens to upend the entire nation (of course it does!).

As he navigates a web of lies and deception (oh yes!), Peter must use all of his skills and training to uncover (wait for it!) the truth before it’s too late! (There it is.) A spy thriller meets political drama should be enough to…keep you up at Night. U Up for The Night Agent?

There’s No Accounting for Celebrity Accountability: Charles Barkley Has Been Right Since 1993

I’ve been loafing in the 90s.

Just finished reading The Fresh Prince Project: How the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Remixed America by Chris Palmer. A love letter that revisits the beloved sitcom. (Chris does excellent work noting the various Jordans Will Smith rocks on the show.)

On Wednesday Netflix released Waco: American Apocalypse. A 3-part docuseries about the 1993 Waco, Texas combat when cult leader David Koresh faced off against the federal government in a 51-day siege. I wrote about it in late February in Don’t Let The F-U-N in Fundamentalism Fool You!

And we’re gonna kick off today’s proceedings with Charles Barkley’s classic I Am Not A Role Model commercial which came out in 1993. Same year as Waco.

The past is a candy-sticky 4 year old that persistently (and annoyingly) asks “why?”

Rollin With Role Models?

The entire text of this short Nike ad is: “I am not a role model. I’m not paid to be a role model. I’m paid to wreak havoc on the basketball court. Parents should be role models. Just because I dunk a basketball doesn’t mean I should raise your kids.”

Yo…yes! Even as a high school punk in 93 I was like high fives; this makes so much sense. I don’t “need” you to be a nice guy and like help the kids or whatever. You’re here to win basketball games and I’m here to enjoy that. Winning is the only value we agree on. We good! Proceed.

Barely 30 seconds and yet it was an elegant revolution: a rousing rejection of many of our culture’s core values. We’re shrines and shills for famous folks. We have always worship celebrity. Sometimes envied the Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous especially when we see their Cribs.

Lamentably this warped worship leads to betrayal. As much as they’re known for being rich and good looking and enjoying the perks of fame…celebrities mess up. A lot.

Barkley said “I am not a role model” in 1993, 2 years after his dreadful spitting incident.

During an NBA game in 1991, Barkley spit in a fan’s general direction. Only he missed hitting a young girl, a second grader, sitting in the crowd. Fans turned on Barkley and for a while this hot mess refused to go away.

(You know how many dull variations of Spit Happens headlines we hadda endure back then? Barkley was Public Enemy No. 1 but many lazy newspaper copywriters weren’t far behind.)

Later Barkley confessed: “When the spitting incident happened…I remember sitting in a hotel room and I was like dude what the hell is wrong with you? What are you so angry about?”

So he changed how he played and he worked at addressing his untamed anger. An easy line for me to write that doesn’t truly convey the amount of work that takes. And he did change…and thankfully…he kept failing too. Whew.

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